Irony: writing a screed about how much you hate a job while sitting on that job.
I don’t give a fuck.
According to these kids I’m just some ugly faggot who needs to shut the fuck up, so tell me why I should care. Please. I dare you.
They know I can’t walk around today and keep an eye on them, so I keep hearing computer voices turned all the way up suddenly shouting “I LIKE TO FART IN CLASS” and “FUCK FUCK FUCK” and my personal favorite “MR KLUG IS A FAGGOT”
I. Fucking. Hate. These. Kids.
If this is our future, we’re boned.
You- not me this time you bastards, not one single brat in this building is or ever will be my genetic responsibility so YOU- are responsible for this. Why the everliving fuck am I the one dealing with it?
You know what? You fucking deserve the future you are building out of these wasted, broken kids. You deserve a future of economic collapse, non-existent skill, liars, thieves, and illiterate rapists. Some of these kids have already performed some of these criminal feats. I have witnessed with my own eyes kids less than 14 years old walking around the building with their tracking beacon strapped to their ankle. I’ve seen them leave because they are pregnant and no one wants to talk about how it happened or who else is so obviously responsible. I watched a kid square up to a student teacher and realized in that moment that if he swung I was going to jail because FUCK if I was going to let that happen. Fortunately for everyone involved, someone else walked in the room at that moment.
This job is hell.
There is no amount of money you could pay me to make this daily degradation worth it. Because that’s what this is. I have to simply put up with insults that would be justifiable fighting words between adults. There are places in this world where you can expect a beating and possibly death for what these kids say to me on a daily basis.
And the administrators just want to counsel the poor darlings.
I have no words to express how completely that tactic has failed.
You deserve this future.
I do not deserve this treatment. I do not deserve these insults. I do not deserve this degradation of spirit and person.
I fucking hate these kids.
Gods willing, I won’t have to do this job for too many more months and years. Gods willing, the ARC training business will pick back up and I can stop worrying about bills. Gods willing, the money will come through from Mom’s current project and we can start expanding fencing so that the herd can reach profitable size. Gods willing, the Deed will come through soon so that at least one source of stress can be dealt with.
I probably shouldn’t post this mess.
But I just don’t care anymore.