Cat people, dog people

And most of us actually get along pretty well, all overdone comedy tropes aside.

This is meant to be humorous, so please refrain from having any hissy fits. That will be funnier in a moment.

A friend and I stopped for edibles after this month’s Interfaith Council Meeting (wherein yours truly got themselves nominated as Council Secretary… eep.) and tiredness met with low blood sugar to create this gem of a conversation.

Friend: Well yes I’ve had that experience (speaking of leading a rather hard-to coordinate group of people) of wrangling when I was still coordinating a coven of Wiccans. The whole ‘herding cats thing’…

Me: At least I caught a break there. The heathens in my group are more like dogs than cats. Just wave some bacon around and they’ll all gather.

At which point we both about fell out laughing because it was just… perfect.

We went on to discover more wonderful correlations. Then I kept thinking about it and came up with a few more. So here’s what we’ve got.

See, the Wiccans are cat people. They love their comforts and their stuff and their shiny. They don’t coordinate all that well (herding cats for sure). They’ve got the whole ‘night creature, air of mystery’ thing going for them. Some are fluffy. Some are not. Local populations can explode rapidly. It’s easy to get caught up in the softness of their fur, the beauty of their movements, and enigmatic gazes… until someone hocks up a hairball. They are full of contradictions and what works one day is likely to get you scratched the next. Some are gregarious, many work alone. Don’t let the appearance of softness fool you, because when the rubber hits the road they’ve got vicious claws (just look at the scars they leave on each other) and powerful magic that you really don’t want to mess with. They’re cat people.

Heathens, though, are dog people. Yes, we can in fact be rounded up with bribes of food and beer. Generally, we are happiest when we have some task to perform. Some people judge us immediately based on sensationalized stories about bad dogs. Yes, some few really are dangerous. We prefer packs to loneliness. We do everything full-throttle, whether that be work, play, study, or argue. We snap and snarl but bites within the pack aren’t that common. We are fiercely territorial, sometimes to our detriment. Some of us bark, some of us yap, some of us yap way too damn much. It’s the silent ones you need to watch. When a pack really bonds together under a stable alpha, we are a force to be reckoned with. We come in many sizes and shapes and colors, but there’s a bit of wolf in all of us. We’re dog people.

Sometimes, cats and dogs fight. Most of the time, however, we get along just fine. It’s an animal thing.


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